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The Office Quotes (NBC) | Season 7 - The Sting

The Office Season 7 Quotes - The Sting

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  • Conference Room (4 Comments)
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16
likes
Dwight Schrute: I'm gonna intimidate him, ok? Watch this.
[Jim follows Dwight around the corner]
Dwight Schrute: [loudly] So anyways she said that is the biggest penis I have ever scene [Danny looks shocked] and I said I know! That's why I brought you to the penis museum, where tickets are a "thousand" dollars. Oh hello Danny.
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14
likes
Michael Scott: How do I feel about losing the sale? It's like if Michael Phelps, came out of retirement, jumped in the pool, bellyflopped and drowned.
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12
likes
Dwight Schrute: You snubbed her.
Jim Halpert: Dwight please.
Dwight Schrute: Let me handle this Jim. [aggressively] Drop the act, Cordrea. Ok? [Pam walks in behind Dwight] We all know, that you probably thought, that Pam was too, "Meh." Or "too thin without being toned." But I wanna tell you something. She is one of the plain, hearty women of Scranton that make this city great. And so what if she doesn't wear makeup! [Pam mouths "I wear makeup..."] We like her better that way! And you steal clients, don't you. Don't you! [gets in Danny's face]
Danny: That's different.
Dwight Schrute: Ohh that's different. Is it? Ok. Thief! Better check your things people--In fact where are my keys? [checks pocket] Oh. They're in my pocket. False alarm.
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10
likes
Andy: Do you have a minute?
Darryl: I'm very busy with time sensitive work.
Andy: Not to go all Sherlock Holmes on you but I can tell by the reflection in your glasses that you're entering points into WeightWatchers.com.
Darryl: If you don't enter them "immediately," you forget. [looks over] What.
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9
likes
Jim Halpert: You're an exec, at Pennsylvania Solar Tech--
Oscar: That sounds fake!
Dwight Schrute: I told you! You are an exec at Stark Industries! A corporation you inherited from your father--
Jim Halpert: Stop! Stop. Stop it. Here's the story. They need Meredith somewhere else ASAP. Ok? So you're taking over you just gotta get her outta there as soon as you can. Alright?
Oscar: Ok I can do that, then what?
Dwight Schrute: Make him pitch to you! You gotta see what he's got. And remember, you're not gay!
Jim Halpert: Stop it!
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7
likes
Michael Scott: You know what? You clearly don't care so why don't you just leave?
Stanley: I would like to stay, this pertains to me.
Michael Scott: Why don't you go outside an.. take a shot of insulin and have a nap ok?
Stanley: Why do you always assume I have diabetes?
Michael Scott: I donno, your frame, your build? What don't you have a glass of apple juice and tell me your not a diabetic. [Stanley gets up to leave] See! I could tell by the sound you made when you stood up, that you have.. Ok.
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7
likes
["Bring my troops home save and sound, says this little girl..."]
Andy: Ok, honest feedback time. Oscar?
Oscar: It's pandering. And it makes me think you think I'm stupid.
Andy: But do you think it could be famous? Like in a car commercial or something?
Pam Halpert: Not really? It kinda weird, that a grown man is singing from the point of view of a little girl.
Andy: I feel like I could see someone ice skating to it. You know like in the Olympics.
Ryan: [scratching his head] I don't think they usually, skate to such... bad songs.
Andy: Rude! And not helpful.
Creed: Well I really really really really like it.
Andy: Well that... that really bums me out.
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7
likes
Michael Scott [Phyllis puts up her hand] Okay. Yes, Phyillis?
Phyillis I could try to seduce him.
Michael Scott OH MY GOD!
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6
likes
Michael Scott: Can I have your attention! I would like to introduce you to Mr. Danny Cordrea. He is going to be joining us, as our new Travelling Salesman. Say hello to Danny!
Kelly: F*** me.
Michael Scott: Oh. Kay. You know what? No! No. This is not some sort of construction site, for all of Italy! Where you can just go around treating people like meat. We are to respect him. I respect him, because he reminds me of somebody. Can anybody guess who that is?
Kelly: [dreamily] Josh Duhamel.
Angela: Yeah I can see that!
Michael Scott: No! No. Somebody in this office.
Kevin: He's like a better-looking Andy.
Andy: Thanks Kevin.
Michael Scott: No, me. Right? Sorta like, a little younger version of me?
Oscar: It's hard to judge ourselves accurately isn't it.
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5
likes
Andy Bernard: I'm starting a band and I need, you, on keyboards.
Darryl: Naw... I play for pleasure.
Andy Bernard: This is for pleasure.
Darryl: I wouldn't enjoy that.
Andy Bernard: I'm willing to pay you.
Darryl: Oh yeah? How much.
Andy Bernard: Sixty bucks a session..
Darryl: That's crazy money. I'll take forty.
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4
likes
Dwight Schrute: We have a big meeting with chief buyer for Frames Select, Steve Nash. He's--
Jim Halpert: Not "The" Steve Nash. His big though, he's kind of like Scranton's Steve Nash.
Dwight Schrute: Will you stop putting in terms you "think" they'll understand? It's condescending.
Jim Halpert: I'm not doing that. I'm just explaining.
Dwight Schrute: And who is this "The" Steve Nash.
Jim Halpert: [surprised] Phoenix Suns point guard?
Dwight Schrute: No.
Jim Halpert: No, nothin'?
Dwight Schrute: "No," mister jock hipster.
Jim Halpert: Well I'm neither of those things, so.. [makes a Jim face]
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4
likes
Michael Scott: Alright on the count of three, "Showtime". Ready? One two--
Jim Halpert: Nope, not doing that.
Dwight Schrute: I've been on showtime mode since breakfast have you not--
Michael Scott: Ok! Alright just forget it then.
Jim Halpert: Showwtime!
Michael Scott: It's showtime!--[turns around late]--agh never mind!
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4
likes
Michael Scott: This morning Danny Cordrea stole a sale from me so what do I do? I go out and I steal Danny Cordea. The that mattered, I made. Boom. Funny thing about it, we don't even need 'em. We already have Packer on the road! Crrrrap. I forgot about Packer! [exhales]
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3
likes
Michael Scott: Yes, I can ride a bike. I take spinning classes, three times a month, I think I know how to ride a bike.
[Jim and Pam are holding Michael steading on the bike]
Jim Halpert: Are you sure you once knew how to do this?
Michael Scott: I did, yes! I had those extra wheels on the back, that support you.
[Jim and Pam start walking Michael on the bike...]
Michael Scott: Mich-ael! Mich-ael! [everyone starts cheering as Michael starts moving] Michael!
Jim Halpert: Just steer more now!
Michael Scott: Oh my God!!!
[Michael hits a crashes then gets up cheering]
Michael Scott: You never forget! Wooo!
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3
likes
[pointing out their competitor, Danny]
Dwight Schrute: There he is.
Michael Scott: [looks over] Oh no that's a male model.
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3
likes
[sitting down at Dwight's surveillance]
Michael Scott: You know what this is? A stinger.
Dwight Schrute: The what.
Michael Scott: Like the movie?
Jim Halpert: I think you mean The Sting.
Michael Scott: Paul Newman Robert Redford? They're robbers?
[at the same time]
Jim Halpert: Nope different movie.
Dwight Schrute: It's called The Sting. The Sting.
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3
likes
Jim Halpert: Meredith was the perfect choice to play the head of the company... Her lunch break lined up with our appointment with Danny, and... That's it. That's really all we were looking for.
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3
likes
Michael Scott: Well get ready because your life is going to get better!
Phyllis: It's not going to get better he's going to steal all of our clients.
Michael Scott: No! No, wrong. He would've stolen your clients but you know what? He can't now. This guy, used to steal sales from us, now he's going to steal sales FOR us.
Dwight Schrute: Where's he going to sit I mean there's no more seats!
Michael Scott: He doesn't need to sit he's a travelling salesman. Look, I am not going to exclude good people from our staff simply because they are threatening to you. And unless you have a better argument than that, I suggest you leave.
Dwight Schrute: [everyone starts to leave] Where's he gonna park there's no more reserved parking spots.
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2
likes
Phyllis: You know I forget about milk, this is a terrific reminder.
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2
likes
Danny: Ok so you setup this fake company, then you hired this homeless women to impersonate an executive, to spy on me so that you could copy my sales technique.
Michael Scott: Yes and it's the sincerest form of flattery!
Danny: Or, crazy!
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2
likes
Jim Halpert: Hey crazy. Um, so. That's it? You're just--you're fine?
Dwight Schrute: It's after five Jim. I'm not gonna take this home. [reaches out to shake Danny's hand] Pleasure.
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1
like
Oscar: Andy I feel like a tourist in my own city! I literally can't wait to wake up every morning.
Pam Halpert: Ohkay.
4 Comments in the Conference Room
Quotes from  Michael Scott  Dwight Schrute  Creed Bratton  Pam  Random Quotes from All Seasons

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