Jim Halpert Quotes From The Office

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Jim Halpert: I gotta tell you this baby is amazing. She, gets me out of everything... And I--and I love her. I also love her very much.
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Jim Halpert: Hey, Dwight, send in the subs!
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Jim Halpert: Pam is staying late tonight to, uh, achieve her dreams. So, pretty proud of her. Unfortunately she was my ride--
Meredith: You comin'!?
Jim Halpert: I uhh--
Meredith: Piss or get off the pot!
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Dwight Schrute: [ordering a stripper] Ruddy cheeks, thick calves, no tats, no moles, no tats-- No, 'tats.' Of course I want t--
Jim Halpert: Stop. That's disgusting.
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Jim Halpert: Ok, ladies and gentlemen, welcome! I know you're all very excited but, no matter who gets this, 'I just wanna say that you guys are all employees of the month' in my eyes.
[exaggerated laugh from Dwight]
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Michael Scott: It's after midnight! You're married!
Dwight Schrute: He's married!!
Jim Halpert: That's not how that works.
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Michael Scott: Alright. You're gonna miss the best prank ever.
Jim Halpert: Alright. [pause] Wait. What are you planning on doing?
Michael Scott: Do you really wanna know?
Jim Halpert: Oh God.
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Jim Halpert: You have to stop this.
Michael Scott: Do you hear that Stanley's having an affair!
Jim Halpert: I did. From you. You gotta stop telling people.
Michael Scott: Okay, I get it. You feel out of the loop and you feel sorry for yourself and it's really sad because everyone thinks you're a loser.
Jim Halpert: Do you even know if it's true. Do you have any idea. Because, you might be ruining his life.
[long pause]
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Jim Halpert: Hey. Can I talk to you guys for a second?
Michael Scott: We're not hiring, Jim.
Jim Halpert: Actually I'm here for something else.
Michael Scott: Listen, I can't make you laugh right now.
Jim Halpert: You know I love a good guessing game but why don't I just tell you what I'm here for.
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Michael Scott: Um, Jim?
Jim Halpert: Mm-hmm.
Michael Scott: Today is a very difficult day for a lot of people in this office.
Jim Halpert: Oh I'm sorry--
Michael Scott: Yeah. And the sexy, looks, between you and Pam, the general sexiness, the flowers, it's creating a bit of a hostile work environment.
Jim Halpert: I understand.
Dwight Schrute: It's so sexy it become hostile.
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Jim Halpert: Hey Pam... I think that's empty.
Pam Beesly: No, 'cause the ice melts and then it's like... second drink!
Send "The Office Theme Song" Ringtone to your Cell
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Pam Beesly: Jim's just really passionate about Italian food.
[cut to Jim]
Jim Halpert: Yep. I'm very passionate about Italian food. In fact, um, I'm in love with Italian food.
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