Oscar Quotes From The Office

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Jim Halpert: Hey, dude. Do you know what a rundown is?
Oscar: Use it in a sentence.
Jim Halpert: Uh... can you get this rundown for me?
Oscar: Try another sentence.
Jim Halpert: This rundown better be really good?
Oscar: I don't know but it sounds like the rundown's really important.
Jim Halpert: Charles asked me to do this rundown of all my clients.
Oscar: Why don't you just ask him, what--
Jim Halpert: No, I can't it was like hours ago.
Oscar: What have you been doing?!
Kevin: Try another sentence.
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Oscar: You know what we haven't done in a while? Happy hour... Upstairs, the warehouse, everybody just going out for a drink.
Darryl: Has that ever happened?... ever?
Oscar: Didn't we? I think we did.
Darryl: You want me to invite Matt?
Oscar: Yeah, the, uh the whole gang. Matt included.
Darryl: Look just be straight with me man. You can be gay with Matt just, be straight with me.
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Dwight Shrute: What kind of mileage does this baby get?
Erin: It's like what high school kids take to prom on tv shows.
Oscar: So typical of management to spend money on this. Ugh, bunch of boobs.
Michael Scott: Hate to break it to you Oscar, but some of us like boobs.
Dwight Shrute: Calves. [raises hand] Calves all the way.
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Michael Scott: I'm going in for a procedure today.
Oscar: Is everything ok?
Michael Scott: Yeah. It's routine. I'm just a little bit scared.
Oscar: I'm sure everything will be fine. What's the procedure if you don't mind my asking?
Michael Scott: It is a colonoscopy.
Oscar: Ok.
Michael Scott: In your experience, what should I be expecting, in terms of sensation. Or, emotions. [pause] Is there anything I can do to make it more pleasurable for me or for Dr. Shandri. My main concern is should I have a safe word?
Oscar: Yeah. [walks out of the office]
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Michael Scott: Maybe we could go out for a beer sometime, and you could tell me... how you do that to another dude.
Oscar: That sounds like a great, wonderful idea. Let's do that.
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Dwight Schrute: Michael, why do you keep looking at the front door.
Michael Scott: No reason.
Dwight Schrute: Is somebody after you?
Oscar: Why do you always go to that? Has anyone ever been after anyone in this office.
Dwight Schrute: Hey! It just takes one.
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Oscar Andy, you had a great quarter. Robert will understand. $830 is like a rounding error.
Andy Bernard So make that error!
Kevin Hey! I can make that error!
Andy Bernard Well... it's just... I know that making errors sounds like your kind of thing, but it's a little more complicated than that...
Kevin [Disappointed] ...Oh...
Andy Bernard I just need a real accountant on this.
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Oscar: I'll look on Web MD. What are your symptoms?
Angela: Oh everybody, Oscar found a reason to look on Web MD.
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Kevin: I wouldn't last in jail, Oscar, I'm not like you.
Oscar: What's that supposed to mean?
Kevin: Oh you don't know about jail? Oh you would LOVE jail.
Oscar: Why would I love jail.
Kevin: Because-- [thinks for a second] you would love it. [smiles at camera]
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