Oscar Quotes From The Office
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| Michael Scott: | [on his cellphone] No, I'll talk to her. No, nobody talks to my baby that way. Yeah I'll let you know how it goes. Alright. Bye, Pickle. [hangs up and walks into the conference room] Pamela Morgan Beesly you need to apologize to your mother right now. |
| Angela: | I'm sorry, I was told I have the floor. |
| Oscar: | Whoa hold on, hold on. What's going on? |
| Jim Halpert: | Nothing! Nothing at all. "It's all goood." |
| Pam Beesly: | I'm not apologizing to anyone. Michael owes ME an apology. |
| Michael Scott: | For trying to find happiness in the arms of a lover? |
| Pam Beesly: | Don't call my mother your lover! |
| Kevin: | Yes! That's what I'm talking about. |
| Andy: | That is not ok dude! |
| Michael Scott: | Ok, in my defence-- |
| Phyllis: | Disgusting. |
| Creed: | That's messed up man. |
| Pam Beesly: | Yes. Thank you. Welcome to my personal hell! |
| Oscar: | You have no sense of boundaries, Michael. |
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| Oscar Martinez: | Michael, I'm reading. |
| Michael Scott: | What are you reading? |
| Oscar Martinez: | The Atlantic. |
| Michael Scott: | Oh! That is my favorite ocean. I love it. |
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| Oscar: | Guys, I drive an SUV. Does that mean I'm in the mob? |
| Dwight Schrute: | No, not that by itself but look at all the facts. He seems like a mobster. |
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| Michael Scott: | Ladies and gentleman, I have some bad news. Meredith was hit by a car. |
| Oscar: | Where? |
| Michael Scott: | It happened this morning in the parking lot. I took her to the hospital. And the doctors tried to save her, life, they did the best they could. And she is going to be ok. |
| Stanley: | What is wrong with you? Why would you have to phrase is like that? |
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| Michael Scott: | Daddy's here and Daddy is going to take care of you. |
| Oscar: | Please don't refer to yourself as our daddy. |
| Michael Scott: | I am your big daddy and I am gonna kiss de booboo. |
| Andy: | Andy is afwaid. |
| Michael Scott: | Andy afwaid? |
| Andy: | Yes. |
| Michael Scott: | Are you all afwaid? |
| Dwight Schrute: | No. |
| Michael Scott: | Daddy here for youu. My wittle angels. |
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| Andy: | Guys, stop everything. I'm about to ask out this girl and I'm completely panicking. |
| Oscar: | [walking away] Oh my desk is over.... |
| Creed: | This gal. She's really into you? |
| Andy: | Yeah! Yeah, I mean, I've seen her like three times today and we love all the same music, and whenever I walk into a room she totally looks up... |
| Creed: | Ah ah. Say no more. This is how I got Sqeaky Fromme. No small talk. Just show her who's the boss. Just go right in and kiss her. |
| Andy: | Ok it sounds risky... |
| Creed: | Have I ever steered you wrong, Jim? |
| Andy: | [thinking] Wait what? |
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| Oscar: | Do you know? |
| Michael Scott: | Do I know what? |
| Oscar: | I think you know. |
| Michael Scott: | Mm, no... |
| Phyllis: | Know what? |
| Pam Beesly: | Yeah, know what? |
| Oscar: | Does anyone happen to know what 15% of 4300 is? |
| Michael Scott: | 645 dollars. |
| Kevin: | Michael's a genius! |
| Oscar: | Why did you say dollars? |
| Michael Scott: | Because that is how my mind works. |
| Oscar: | What's 15% of 200? [Michael doesn't answer] Thank you. Everyone, Michael is returning the surplus so he can keep 15% as a bonus. |
| Jim Halpert: | Wait, what? |
| Pam Beesly: | You can do that? |
| Kevin: | Hey Michael, what's 394 times 5,912? |
| Michael Scott: | Let's see... |
| Pam Beesly: | You're gonna give yourself a bonus of $645 instead of getting the entire office something it really needs? |
| Michael Scott: | I don't need $645; I already have $645, more or less. |
| Oscar: | You're gonna get us a copier then? |
| Michael Scott: | This is so stupid. |
| Pam Beesly: | Or chairs? |
| Michael Scott: | This is so, so stupid. And, God... [looks at his watch] that's my phone. |
| Stanley: | I didn't hear a phone. |
| Michael Scott: | To be continued! |
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| Oscar: | Look it doesn't take a genius to know that every organization thrives when it has two leaders. [shakes head] Go ahead, name a country that doesn't have two presidents. A boat that sets sail without two captains. Where would Catholicism be, without the popes. |