The Office Season 7 Quotes - Garage Sale
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| Michael Scott | Holly Flax, marrying me will you be? |
| Holly | You're wife becoming will be I. |
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| Michael Scott | [pouring gasoline] Hey, Pam! |
| Pam Beesly | Hey, Michael. I just came out to see what you were doing and to maybe stop you. |
| Michael Scott | It looks like I'm running out of gas. You know what, do you have a siphon? |
| Pam Beesly | Gas for what? |
| Michael Scott | I'm asking Holly a question in fire. |
| Pam Beesly | [excited] Michael, are you proposing? |
| Michael Scott | Yup... My hands and shoes are covered in gas. Do you think you could light this for me? [hands Pam gas can and matches] |
| Pam Beesly | Sure... [walks away] |
| Michael Scott | Hey! Are you going to light this or not? |
| Pam Beesly | Michael... you had two ideas today, and one of them was great. The other was terrible. |
| Michael Scott | I don't have time for riddles, Pam! |
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| Michael Scott | How about this; I throw a corpse dressed like me off the roof. It hits the ground and the head pops off. And this leads to me saying the line "I lost my head when I fell in love with you". And it's easy to get a corpse these days, right? Just call the local medical college. |
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| Dwight Schrute | Why would I want some random black man's photo album sitting on my bookshelf? I'm not James Franco. |
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| Michael Scott: | I want this to be an event that everyone talks about always and forever. |
| Jim Halpert: | Totally reasonable. |
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| Michael Scott | Get this; Kevin wanted to buy my Bowflex for $200. But I was like, dude, that's a prop from my movie. |
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| Holly: | Michael called dad? |
| Holly's mom: | Your friend Michael, yes. What's going on? |
| Holly: | Um, i think i know but i'll sound stupid if i'm wrong. Is dad there? |
| Holly's dad: | Holly? |
| Holly: | Hi dad! |
| Holly's dad: | There was a program on TV about india- |
| Holly: | Um, ok, did you connect with Michael? |
| Holly's dad: | Do you want to watch it with me? |
| Holly: | I'm not there dad. I'm in Pennsylvania. |
| Holly's dad: | What are you doing there? |
| Holly: | I live here. Can I talk to you about Michael? |
| Holly's dad: | I'll put your mother on. |
| Holly: | No no, dad...? |
| Holly's mom: | Holly? |
| Holly: | Mom, dad can't seem to focus on a subject. |
| Holly's mom: | Dont worry about your father. He's got me. |
| Holly: | Well who do you have? |
| Holly's mom: | I've got your father. He's right here, do you want to talk to him? |
| Holly: | No! Mom... |
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| Dwight Schrute: | You got this Kosher certified? |
| Ryan: | No I meant it like, it's cool, it's Kosher, it's all good. |
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| Kevin: | When I was a kid I was on "Dallas." |
| Andy: | Really? |
| Kevin: | Yeah. We missed our connecting flight so we spent the entire day on Dallas. Then we spent a week on Hawaii. I was on heaven. |
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| Dwight Schrute: | What is this? |
| Jim Halpert: | How did those get out? |
| Dwight Schrute: | Professor Coperfield's Miracle Lagooms? |
| Jim Halpert: | I was in Jamaca, and I got lost and it was getting dark this one night and out of nowhere this guy comes with a cart and he's selling these. Dwight, he told me things about myself that there's no way he could have known. |
| Dwight Schrute: | That's a common swindler's trick. |
| Jim Halpert: | Probably, probably. So I buy some. I turn the corner, I feel like an idiot, so I go back to get my money... He was gone. |
| Dwight Schrute: | So you want to sell ME magic beans? Hahaha! |
| Jim Halpert: | Correction: I do NOT want to sell you Professor Copperfields Miracle Lagooms. |
| Dwight Schrute: | Nice try. No- correction: terrible try. Ha. |
| [Later] | |
| Dwight Schrute: | (Dwight walks by Jim's table) Jim, put those away. |
| Jim Halpert: | (Sees the lagooms out and grabs them) Sorry about that, Pam must have put those out. |
| Dwight Schrute: | Alright, just out of curiosity, what were the claims to thise beans? |
| Jim Halpert: | They're lagooms, Dwight. And you're just going to make fun of me, so why would I..? You know what, this ends now. (tears up lagooms) |
| Dwight Schrute: | (Later) What the..?! (Sees the previously destroyed lagooms on Jim's table) |
| Jim Halpert: | Oh my God. |
| Dwight Schrute: | That's impossible! |
| Jim Halpert: | It is. Right? I mean, it's impossible. |
| Dwight Schrute: | Alright. I'll take them. |
| Jim Halpert: | They're probably worthless. |
| Dwight Schrute: | Probably. |
| Jim Halpert: | Leave the telescope. |
| Dwight Schrute: | (To camera) I started with a thumb tac, and traded my way to a telescope. But in a way, the most vauable thing here wasnt the telescope at all. No, it was the packet of beans, and I traded the telescope for it, and I can just go buy another telescope. |
| (Later) (Dwight is seen watering the lagooms in flower pots. Dwight leaves and Jim comes out with full grown plants in pots that look the exact same.) |
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| Michael Scott: | I am not going to be proposed to in the break room. That is not going to be our story. I shoulda burned this place down when I had a chance. |
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| Michael Scott: | I am calling because I'm going to have to fire your daughter Holly because she's such a terrible employee. I'm just kidding. |
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| Jim: | Holly, will you marry me? |
| Holly: | No. |
| Stanley: | Marry me, Holly. |
| Holly: | No. |
| Michael Scott: | That guy's got more than he can handle as it is. |
| Oscar: | Will you marry me? |
| Holly: | No. |
| Michael Scott: | That marriage would be a sham. |
| Gabe: | Will you marry me? |
| Holly: | No. |
| Michael Scott: | Easy no. |
| Angela: | Will you marry me? |
| Holly: | No. |
| Michael Scott: | That would be hot. I would pay to see that. |
| Ryan: | Will you marry me, Holly? |
| Holly: | No. |
| Michael Scott: | Only one that I was kind of worried about. |
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| Michael Scott: | (to Holly) This is where I fell in love with you, and this is where I ask you to marry me. |
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| Pam Halpert: | Michael, she's perfect for you. |
| Oscar: | She's the one. |
| Jim Halpert: | She's amazing. This is very exciting. |
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| Dwight Schrute: | Let me tell you about me like him. (Ryan) he comes over and you're like 'Hey baby, let me light a candle' and you pull out this one- half used. And he's like 'Who else is she seeing? I better lock her down fast'. |
| Kelly: | You can take my Hellen Fielding collection. |
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| Ryan: | My mom makes the best pesto in the world. And I always tell her, "Mom you should sell this. You'd make a fortune." And she always says, "No. It's just for family." Well, finally I was like **** it, I'll sell it. So I'm like, "Mom, I need you to make a ton of pesto for a pesto party for all my friends." She's like, "Oh, okay." Pesto party, really? Anyway, she makes like a hundred bottles worth. It's so good. And Phyllis just had that Mom look I wanted. |
| [later] | |
| Oscar: | Where did you get this? [cut to a table filled with salsa with a label of a picture of Oscar, wearing a sombrero.] |
| Ryan: | My mom also makes the best salsa. |
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