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The Office Quotes (NBC) | Season 7 - Garage Sale

The Office Season 7 Quotes - Garage Sale

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  • Conference Room (6 Comments)
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12
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Michael Scott Holly Flax, marrying me will you be?
Holly You're wife becoming will be I.
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8
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Michael Scott [pouring gasoline] Hey, Pam!
Pam Beesly Hey, Michael. I just came out to see what you were doing and to maybe stop you.
Michael Scott It looks like I'm running out of gas. You know what, do you have a siphon?
Pam Beesly Gas for what?
Michael Scott I'm asking Holly a question in fire.
Pam Beesly [excited] Michael, are you proposing?
Michael Scott Yup... My hands and shoes are covered in gas. Do you think you could light this for me? [hands Pam gas can and matches]
Pam Beesly Sure... [walks away]
Michael Scott Hey! Are you going to light this or not?
Pam Beesly Michael... you had two ideas today, and one of them was great. The other was terrible.
Michael Scott I don't have time for riddles, Pam!
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8
likes
Dwight Schrute Schrutes are farmers by hobby, but traders by trade.
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5
likes
Michael Scott How about this; I throw a corpse dressed like me off the roof. It hits the ground and the head pops off. And this leads to me saying the line "I lost my head when I fell in love with you". And it's easy to get a corpse these days, right? Just call the local medical college.
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4
likes
Dwight Schrute Why would I want some random black man's photo album sitting on my bookshelf? I'm not James Franco.
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4
likes
Michael Scott: I want this to be an event that everyone talks about always and forever.
Jim Halpert: Totally reasonable.
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3
likes
Andy Bernard We must honorably adhere to the rules that we are making up on the spot.
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3
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Michael Scott Get this; Kevin wanted to buy my Bowflex for $200. But I was like, dude, that's a prop from my movie.
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3
likes
Kevin: When I was a kid I was on "Dallas."
Andy: Really?
Kevin: Yeah. We missed our connecting flight so we spent the entire day on Dallas. Then we spent a week on Hawaii. I was on heaven.
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3
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Holly: Michael called dad?
Holly's mom: Your friend Michael, yes. What's going on?
Holly: Um, i think i know but i'll sound stupid if i'm wrong. Is dad there?
Holly's dad: Holly?
Holly: Hi dad!
Holly's dad: There was a program on TV about india-
Holly: Um, ok, did you connect with Michael?
Holly's dad: Do you want to watch it with me?
Holly: I'm not there dad. I'm in Pennsylvania.
Holly's dad: What are you doing there?
Holly: I live here. Can I talk to you about Michael?
Holly's dad: I'll put your mother on.
Holly: No no, dad...?
Holly's mom: Holly?
Holly: Mom, dad can't seem to focus on a subject.
Holly's mom: Dont worry about your father. He's got me.
Holly: Well who do you have?
Holly's mom: I've got your father. He's right here, do you want to talk to him?
Holly: No! Mom...
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2
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Michael Scott: I am not going to be proposed to in the break room. That is not going to be our story. I shoulda burned this place down when I had a chance.
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2
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Dwight Schrute: You got this Kosher certified?
Ryan: No I meant it like, it's cool, it's Kosher, it's all good.
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2
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Dwight Schrute: What is this?
Jim Halpert: How did those get out?
Dwight Schrute: Professor Coperfield's Miracle Lagooms?
Jim Halpert: I was in Jamaca, and I got lost and it was getting dark this one night and out of nowhere this guy comes with a cart and he's selling these. Dwight, he told me things about myself that there's no way he could have known.
Dwight Schrute: That's a common swindler's trick.
Jim Halpert: Probably, probably. So I buy some. I turn the corner, I feel like an idiot, so I go back to get my money... He was gone.
Dwight Schrute: So you want to sell ME magic beans? Hahaha!
Jim Halpert: Correction: I do NOT want to sell you Professor Copperfields Miracle Lagooms.
Dwight Schrute: Nice try. No- correction: terrible try. Ha.
[Later]
Dwight Schrute: (Dwight walks by Jim's table) Jim, put those away.
Jim Halpert: (Sees the lagooms out and grabs them) Sorry about that, Pam must have put those out.
Dwight Schrute: Alright, just out of curiosity, what were the claims to thise beans?
Jim Halpert: They're lagooms, Dwight. And you're just going to make fun of me, so why would I..? You know what, this ends now. (tears up lagooms)
Dwight Schrute: (Later) What the..?! (Sees the previously destroyed lagooms on Jim's table)
Jim Halpert: Oh my God.
Dwight Schrute: That's impossible!
Jim Halpert: It is. Right? I mean, it's impossible.
Dwight Schrute: Alright. I'll take them.
Jim Halpert: They're probably worthless.
Dwight Schrute: Probably.
Jim Halpert: Leave the telescope.
Dwight Schrute: (To camera) I started with a thumb tac, and traded my way to a telescope. But in a way, the most vauable thing here wasnt the telescope at all. No, it was the packet of beans, and I traded the telescope for it, and I can just go buy another telescope.
(Later) (Dwight is seen watering the lagooms in flower pots. Dwight leaves and Jim comes out with full grown plants in pots that look the exact same.)
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2
likes
Jim: Holly, will you marry me?
Holly: No.
Stanley: Marry me, Holly.
Holly: No.
Michael Scott: That guy's got more than he can handle as it is.
Oscar: Will you marry me?
Holly: No.
Michael Scott: That marriage would be a sham.
Gabe: Will you marry me?
Holly: No.
Michael Scott: Easy no.
Angela: Will you marry me?
Holly: No.
Michael Scott: That would be hot. I would pay to see that.
Ryan: Will you marry me, Holly?
Holly: No.
Michael Scott: Only one that I was kind of worried about.
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1
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Kevin: [Holding up money] And THAT is Dallas.
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1
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Michael Scott: I am calling because I'm going to have to fire your daughter Holly because she's such a terrible employee. I'm just kidding.
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1
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Old Lady: How much for the Slip 'n Slide?
Michael Scott: Get lost.
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1
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Michael Scott: (to Holly) This is where I fell in love with you, and this is where I ask you to marry me.
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1
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Ryan: Blogs are out but people are texting each other "no more animals."
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1
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Ryan: My mom makes the best pesto in the world. And I always tell her, "Mom you should sell this. You'd make a fortune." And she always says, "No. It's just for family." Well, finally I was like **** it, I'll sell it. So I'm like, "Mom, I need you to make a ton of pesto for a pesto party for all my friends." She's like, "Oh, okay." Pesto party, really? Anyway, she makes like a hundred bottles worth. It's so good. And Phyllis just had that Mom look I wanted.
[later]
Oscar: Where did you get this? [cut to a table filled with salsa with a label of a picture of Oscar, wearing a sombrero.]
Ryan: My mom also makes the best salsa.
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0
likes
Phyllis: I've got a box of old bras if you want to see them.
Holly: Yes!
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0
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Pam Halpert: Michael, she's perfect for you.
Oscar: She's the one.
Jim Halpert: She's amazing. This is very exciting.
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0
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Dwight Schrute: Let me tell you about me like him. (Ryan) he comes over and you're like 'Hey baby, let me light a candle' and you pull out this one- half used. And he's like 'Who else is she seeing? I better lock her down fast'.
Kelly: You can take my Hellen Fielding collection.
6 Comments in the Conference Room
Quotes from  Michael Scott  Dwight Schrute  Creed Bratton  Pam  Random Quotes from All Seasons

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