The Office Season 3 Quotes - The Return
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| Andy: | Fine. I'll just sit at my desk and be quiet. Sorry I annoyed you with my friendship. [hidden cell phone starts to ring] Excuse me. And I'm also sorry that a lot of people here for some reason think it's funny to steal someone's personal property and hide it from them. Here's a little newsflash! It's not funny! In fact, it's pretty freakin' unfunny! Oh, my GOD. |
| [Andy punches a hole in the wall] | |
| Andy: | That... was an overreaction. Gonna hit the break room. Does anybody want anything? Pam, you good? |
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| Dwight Schrute: | How would I describe myself? Three words: hard working, alpha male, jack hammer. Merciless. Insatiable. |
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| Michael Scott: | Love that Andy. Right? Solid fellow. Seems smart enough. Likes me a lot. A lot. Too much. Like a crazy person a lil. Not super crazy just... just something about him that creeps me out. I can't really explain it. He's always up in my business. Which is ebonics for being in my face and annoying the bejesus out of me. I don't understand how someone could have so little self awareness. |
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| Dwight Schrute: | I am ready to face any challenges that might be foolish enough to face me. |
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| Andy: | Man, TGI Wednesday. Am I right? |
| Michael Scott: | Yup. |
| Andy: | Gonna go home, get my beer on, get my Lost on. What are you doing later? You wanna hang out? |
| Michael Scott: | Uh, I dunno. Maybe. |
| Andy: | I'll take that as a maybe. |
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| Michael Scott: | It takes a big man to admit his mistake and that's what I did. The important thing is, I learned something. I don't want somebody sucking up to me because they think I am going to help their career. I want them sucking up to me because they genuinely love me. |
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| Michael Scott: | Who's that sportscaster that bit that lady? Mar-something? Andy is like Mar-something. Great sportscaster. Big weirdo creep. |
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| Oscar: | We don't even have to have a party. |
| Michael Scott: | No, hey. Hey, don't be ridiculous. Of course we are going to have a party. The celebration of Oscar. Oscar night. And I want it to be Oscar specific-- |
| Oscar: | Michael... |
| Michael Scott: | No, no not because you're gay. You're gayness does not define you. Your Mexican-ness is what defines you, to me. And I think we should celebrate Oscar's Mexicanity. So Phyllis I want you to go and find firecrackers and a Chiwawa. |
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| Dwight Schrute: | For your convience I've broken it down into three parts: professional resume, athletic and special skills resume and Dwight Schrute trivia. |
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| Phyllis: | Dwight had a big personality and I have a big personality and a lot of times when two people like that get together, it can be explosive. |
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| Andy: | Hey, just listen. I forgot to tell you the plan for this Saturday. You, me, bar, beers, buzzed, wings, shots, drunk, waitresses hot, football Cornell/Hosfstra, slaughter, then quick nap at my place and then we hit the tizzown. |
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| Oscar Martinez: | Hey, where's Dwight? |
| Jim Halpert: | You didn't hear? |
| Creed Bratton: | Decapitated. Whole big thing. We had a funeral for a bird. |
| Jim Halpert: | I'm pretty sure none of that's real. |
| Creed Bratton: | YOU'RE NOT REAL, MAN! |
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| Andy Bernard: | Feel ya, dawg. |
| Michael Scott: | Yeah? Do you? |
| Andy Barnard: | Absolutely. |
| Michael Scott: | What'd I say? |
| Andy Bernard: | You said rrrrruh-duh-duh-duh-doo! Which is like [snaps] right on. Pam was like "bleh bleh bleh", and you were like "hyeah!" Psh! Nailed it. |
| Michael Scott: | [under his breath] Oh. Oh, no. |
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| Michael Scott: | Um, let me ask you, is there a term besides Mexican that you prefer? Something less offensive? |
| Oscar Martinez: | Mexican isn't offensive. |
| Michael Scott: | Well, it has certain connotations. |
| Oscar Martinez: | Like what? |
| Michael Scott: | Like... I don't... I don't know... |
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3 Comments in the Conference Room