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The Office Quotes (NBC) | Season 3 - The Return

The Office Season 3 Quotes - The Return

  • Quotes
  • Conference Room (3 Comments)
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36
likes
Jim Halpert: I miss Dwight. Congratulations Universe. You win.
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31
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Andy: Fine. I'll just sit at my desk and be quiet. Sorry I annoyed you with my friendship. [hidden cell phone starts to ring] Excuse me. And I'm also sorry that a lot of people here for some reason think it's funny to steal someone's personal property and hide it from them. Here's a little newsflash! It's not funny! In fact, it's pretty freakin' unfunny! Oh, my GOD.
[Andy punches a hole in the wall]
Andy: That... was an overreaction. Gonna hit the break room. Does anybody want anything? Pam, you good?
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27
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Dwight Schrute: How would I describe myself? Three words: hard working, alpha male, jack hammer. Merciless. Insatiable.
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23
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Jim Halpert: I think your phone's in the ceiling.
Andy: YOU'RE IN THE CEILING!
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22
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Michael Scott: Love that Andy. Right? Solid fellow. Seems smart enough. Likes me a lot. A lot. Too much. Like a crazy person a lil. Not super crazy just... just something about him that creeps me out. I can't really explain it. He's always up in my business. Which is ebonics for being in my face and annoying the bejesus out of me. I don't understand how someone could have so little self awareness.
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22
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Dwight Schrute: I am ready to face any challenges that might be foolish enough to face me.
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16
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Andy: Man, TGI Wednesday. Am I right?
Michael Scott: Yup.
Andy: Gonna go home, get my beer on, get my Lost on. What are you doing later? You wanna hang out?
Michael Scott: Uh, I dunno. Maybe.
Andy: I'll take that as a maybe.
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13
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Michael Scott: It takes a big man to admit his mistake and that's what I did. The important thing is, I learned something. I don't want somebody sucking up to me because they think I am going to help their career. I want them sucking up to me because they genuinely love me.
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13
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Michael Scott: Who's that sportscaster that bit that lady? Mar-something? Andy is like Mar-something. Great sportscaster. Big weirdo creep.
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12
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Oscar: We don't even have to have a party.
Michael Scott: No, hey. Hey, don't be ridiculous. Of course we are going to have a party. The celebration of Oscar. Oscar night. And I want it to be Oscar specific--
Oscar: Michael...
Michael Scott: No, no not because you're gay. You're gayness does not define you. Your Mexican-ness is what defines you, to me. And I think we should celebrate Oscar's Mexicanity. So Phyllis I want you to go and find firecrackers and a Chiwawa.
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11
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Dwight Schrute: For your convience I've broken it down into three parts: professional resume, athletic and special skills resume and Dwight Schrute trivia.
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10
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Phyllis: Dwight had a big personality and I have a big personality and a lot of times when two people like that get together, it can be explosive.
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9
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Andy: Hey, just listen. I forgot to tell you the plan for this Saturday. You, me, bar, beers, buzzed, wings, shots, drunk, waitresses hot, football Cornell/Hosfstra, slaughter, then quick nap at my place and then we hit the tizzown.
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3
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Karen: Do you still have feelings for her?
Jim Halpert: ...Yes.
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1
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Oscar Martinez: Hey, where's Dwight?
Jim Halpert: You didn't hear?
Creed Bratton: Decapitated. Whole big thing. We had a funeral for a bird.
Jim Halpert: I'm pretty sure none of that's real.
Creed Bratton: YOU'RE NOT REAL, MAN!
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Andy Bernard: Feel ya, dawg.
Michael Scott: Yeah? Do you?
Andy Barnard: Absolutely.
Michael Scott: What'd I say?
Andy Bernard: You said rrrrruh-duh-duh-duh-doo! Which is like [snaps] right on. Pam was like "bleh bleh bleh", and you were like "hyeah!" Psh! Nailed it.
Michael Scott: [under his breath] Oh. Oh, no.
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Michael Scott: Um, let me ask you, is there a term besides Mexican that you prefer? Something less offensive?
Oscar Martinez: Mexican isn't offensive.
Michael Scott: Well, it has certain connotations.
Oscar Martinez: Like what?
Michael Scott: Like... I don't... I don't know...
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Oscar: Part of me wants people in the office to have learned their lesson and just shut the hell up. But part of me thinks, you know what? Keep talking. I'd really love a home theater.
3 Comments in the Conference Room
Quotes from  Michael Scott  Dwight Schrute  Creed Bratton  Pam  Random Quotes from All Seasons

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