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Two eyes, two ears, a chin, a mouth, ten fingers, two nipples, a butt, two kneecaps, a penis. I have just described to you the Loch Ness Monster. And the reward for its capture? All the riches in Scotland. So I have one question. Why are you here?
Holly broke up with AJ last week, which is the greatest thing that has ever happened...to me. To Holly, it's been the worst week of her life, and I know for a fact that there was a week for her in high school where she got mono and her first period ever. Too much information? That's what I thought, but here I am using it.
I can't have this go badly. I'm a terrible salesman, and I haven't been making very many sales lately...or ever. This is my only idea on how to turn things around. If it goes badly, I might lose my job. Which would suck, because this is the only job I've ever been good at.
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