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The Office Quotes (NBC) | Creed Quotes

Creed Quotes From The Office

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Creed: I remember it was very late at night, like eleven, eleven-thirty. Big fella comes in, screaming about God knows what. I think maybe Halpert had stolen his car, something like that. So the big fella pulls out a sock filled with nickels, then Schrute, grabs a can of hairspray and a lighter-
Angela: You're useless.
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Pam Beesly: Hello, this is... the client.
Creed: It's Creed. FYI I'm starting my own paper company, looking to poach some chumps. You in?
Pam Beesly: Yes.
Creed: [laughing] Cool. Let's keep this on the QT, I don't want you to be a dead mama jama.
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Dwight Schrute: Who's the father?
Pam Beesly: Jim.
Dwight Schrute: How far along?
Jim Halpert: Four months?
Creed: Who's the OB/GYN?
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Michael Scott: Phyllis.
Phyllis: Oh no, they're still not done.
Michael Scott: No no no, let me see. [picks up the mostly knitted mittens] Oh Phyllis, nice try. I love 'em. [waves goodbye to her with the mittens] [Michael begins walking out the office, he takes one last look at all his friends to see them working, and Jim looking back, teary eyed]
Creed: [drinking from Michael's World's Best Boss mug] See ya tomorrow boss!
Michael Scott: Later guys. [leaves the office]
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Rose: Ok. You didn't maintain a hundred beats per minute. And the ambulance didn't arrive because no body called 911. So you lost 'em.
Dwight Schrute: Ok. He's dead. Anyone know what we do next? Anybody? Rose?
Rose: I have no idea.
Phyllis: We bury him.
Dwight Schrute: Wrong. Check for an organ donor card. If he has one we only have minutes to harvest.
Creed: He has no wallet, I checked.
Michael Scott: He is an organ donor.
Dwight Schrute: [excitedly] He is? Give me some ice in a Styrofoam bucket. [removes a hunting knife from his ankle and cuts open the dummy] We search for the organs! [digging around inside] Where's the heart? The precious heart.
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Michael Scott: This is Creed, and he is in charge of... something... right?
Creed: That is correct.
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[trying to repack a box]
Oscar: Did we try printer first? Shredder at an angle? Fax, cable, then the scanner upside down?
Pam Beesly: Yes.
Creed: Have you tried making everything smaller.
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Stanley: Michael don't listen to them.
Michael Scott: Thank you Stanley.
Stanley: You just ignore their carping.
Michael Scott: Ok.
Dwight Schrute: Michael.
Michael Scott: Yes.
Dwight Schrute: A carp is both a fish and a term for complaining. They're mocking you with wordplay.
Creed: Hey Boss. Did you "Find Nemo"?
Michael Scott: I could name Pixar movies too. Toy Story!
Oscar: Don't you mean, Coy Story?
[everyone laughs]
Phyllis: And when you fell in, did you Flounder?
Dwight Schrute: Michael, a flounder is both a kind of fish--
Michael Scott: I know what a flounder is!
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Creed: I feel terrible about Debbie Brown. She got fired 'cuz of Dwight. So I thought I'd pass around a goodbye card, maybe everyone could put in a couple of bucks to help her through these difficult times. Why do bad things always happen to the good people? It's tragic. It's just tragic .[Creed pockets money and throws out card]
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Kelly: Why is there a Chiclet on my cake?
Jim Halpert: That's the best part. That represents a pillow, or a television.
Dwight Schrute: Our theme, if you will,--
Jim Halpert: Because the fun part is you get to decide on an hour of television or an hour of napping.
Dwight Schrute: That's our theme!
Kelly: [smiling] Cool.
Jim Halpert: Yeah?
Kelly: I love it.
[Dwight and Jim high-five]
Dwight Schrute: Yes! Ok, so what's it gonna be Kapoor?
Kevin: Ooh! Can she pick a half hour of each?
Jim and Dwight: No.
Kevin: Oh. Then pick tv.
Meredith: Take a nap.
Kevin: Watching tv at work is really cool.
Stanley: Take a nap. Nothing good is on right now.
Creed: Bonnie Hunt is on.
Kelly: I have been watching tv all week, I choose nap.
Dwight Schrute: Ok nap it is! Everyone out! Get out! We're going to be eating cake at our desks! Go go go go go go.
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Creed: What is wrong with this woman? She's asking about stuff that's nobody's business. 'What do I do?' What do I do, I do here. I should have written it down. 'Qua' something. Quaaa. Quarr. Quab. Quall. Qwer. Quobbity! Quobbity assurance!
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Quotes from  Michael Scott  Dwight Schrute  Creed Bratton  Pam  Random Quotes from All Seasons

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