The Office Season 3 Quotes - Back from Vacation
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Toby: | Hey, I need to talk to you-- |
Michael Scott: | Not now. Not ever. |
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Pam Beesly: | Michael? It's Jan on the phone for you. |
Michael Scott: | No, no, no. Hang up. Hang up. Tell her I'm not here. Don't. Don't. I ran outta gas. Hit a deer. I hit- I hit a deer with my car. Don't! I hit a cat. Tell her I hit a cat. |
Pam Beesly: | He'll call you back. |
Michael Scott: | She bought it? Ok. Ok... [walks away] |
Dwight Schrute: | Michael hit a deer? |
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Michael Scott: | That photo is my personal property and if you are telling me that you went on my computer and stole that photo then I am gonna call the cops. |
Toby: | Michael, nine different people emailed me that photo, including my ex-wife and.. we don't talk. |
Michael Scott: | Well. Then this is probably the ice breaker you need. |
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Phyllis: | I called every grocery store in Scranton and no one sells whole pigs. |
Angela: | Did you try the petting zoo? |
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Michael Scott: | Jan told me to play it cool, and not tell anybody, because it could get us both in trouble. So officially, I did not see her. But I did see Jan there. In our room. At night. And in the morning. That's all I'm gonna say. Sex. Sex. We had sex. I had sex with her. I had sex with Jan. |
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Pam Beesly: | You can't today, we're doing inventory. |
Michael Scott: | Inventory's at the end of December. |
Pam Beesly: | We couldn't do it without you so we postponed. |
Michael Scott: | I specifically went on vacation so I would miss it. |
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Michael Scott: | Tonight we are going to have an inventory luau. I want to bring back a little slice of paradise to the Dunder Mifflin warehouse inventory, so party-planning committee, get on it. |
Angela: | By the end of the day? That's impossible. |
Michael Scott: | The Jamaicans don't have a word for 'impossible.' |
Jim Halpert: | Yep, it's English, it's 'impossible.' |
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Michael Scott: | I have a special assignment for you. |
Dwight Schrute: | Who's the target? |
Michael Scott: | A sensitive email has been released to the office. It contains a file. A picture. Filename is Jamaica Jan Sun Princess. |
Dwight Schrute: | What's it of? |
Michael Scott: | Not important. |
Dwight Schrute: | Unless you're willing to tell me everything I cannot accept this assignment. |
Michael Scott: | Forget it- |
Dwight Schrute: | Ok, I accept it. |
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Michael Scott: | And I, to you, in addition, feel, the same feelings, that you are, as well. |
[long pause] | |
Jan: | Good. Good. |
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Pam Beesly: | No, I didn't mind helping Jim with his problem. That's what friends do. I, help, Phyllis all the time. Just yesterday, I untangled a piece of tape from her hair. So, yeah. |
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Pam Beesly: | Oh, also, Michael went to Jamaica with Jan. |
Jim Halpert: | Yeah, how have we not talked about this already? I mean what happened there? Kidnapping? |
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Michael Scott: | How hard is a luau? All you need are some grass skirts, pineapple, poi, tiki torches, suckling pig, some fire dancers. That's all you need. |
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Michael Scott: | Got to see how Jamaicans live. It is great. You know? They just relax. They party all the time. |
Pam Beesly: | It's kind of an impoverished country. |
Michael Scott: | Yeah. Gosh. Great. |
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Kevin: | Hi Jan. You look... tan. |
Jan: | I was in Scottsdale, visiting my sister. |
Kevin: | Yeah? How was it? |
Jan: | Very sunny. Family's important. |
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Michael Scott: | Aren't you going to ask me how Jamaica was? Say it. Ask me. |
Pam Beesly: | How was Jamaica-- |
Michael Scott: | It was so good!! |
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