Michael Scott Quotes From The Office

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Michael Scott: There are ten rules of business that you need to learn. Number one: You need to play to win. But, you also have to.. win, to play.
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Michael Scott: Between the sheets, we were like Jordan and Pippen.
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Michael Scott: There she is. Jan Levinson. First thing in the morning.
Jan: Michael.
Michael Scott: Love to start my day with a hearty bowl of Jan.
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Dwight Schrute: Seasick? Captain Jack says to watch the moon.
Michael Scott: Captain Jack's a fart face.
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Michael Scott [to camera] Thank you, Scranton Strangler, I love you. You just took one more person's breath away.
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Michael Scott: Yep. Yep, we hugged it out. But, it turns out I was still a little angry. So I felt I needed to punish him just a little bit more. And I'm making him do my laundry for a year.
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Michael Scott [Phyllis puts up her hand] Okay. Yes, Phyillis?
Phyillis I could try to seduce him.
Michael Scott OH MY GOD!
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Michael Scott: [in awkward "nerd voice"] Con, you unzip your pants and you find that there's a calculator down there.
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Michael Scott: [in reference to Todd Packer] One time he stuck this guys head in the toilet for a full minute. The guy didn't have a very good sense of humor about it. Probably why he didn't get hired.
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[from deleted scenes]
Michael Scott: [to Ryan] You had a rough night tonight, but your life is very good, my friend. You've got a great job, you... You can have any woman you want. You're good looking, you know...
Dwight Schrute: You're friends with a hobbit.
Michael Scott: Yes, you're friends with a hobbit and... Look where you live. I mean, ... Yeah. You got it all.
Ryan: New York is great.
Michael Scott: No, I mean this apartment building. It's fantastic.
Ryan: This is not my apartment. This is the Metropolitan Museum of Art.
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Jim Halpert: If you were a real star you'd put your face in it.
Michael Scott: I love it more!
Oscar: But that doesn't seem.. safe.
Michael Scott: [to camera] IIII love it!
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