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Michael Scott Quotes from The Office
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
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| Michael Scott: | Can I have a ride home? |
| Pam Beesly: | If you sit in the back. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
7
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| Michael Scott: | Did you learn that on the streets? Oh, I'm sorry... |
| Stanley: | No it's okay, I did learn it on the streets, on the ghetto, in fact. |
| Michael Scott: | No kidding... |
| [later, to the camera] | |
| Stanley: | It's all about my bonus. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
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| Ryan: | Hook it up! [smashes a beer bottle in the club] |
| Michael Scott: | Wow... That's dangerous. |
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6
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| Michael Scott: | I've always wanted to be in the witness protection program. Fresh start. No debts, no baggage. Already got my name picked out. Lord Rupert Everton. I am, uh, shipping merchant who raises fancy dogs. That's the life. |
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7
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| Michael Scott: | Incest is bad; racism is bad. ...the more we can encourage interracial dating as a society, the further away we get from incest. Literally. |
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6
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| Michael Scott: | [regarding watermelon hitting car] Deactivate the car alarm, clean up the mess, find out whose car that is. If its Stanley's, call the offices of James P. L. Beeny. See if he handles hate crimes. |
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| Andy: | I know the perfect place too. |
| Michael Scott: | Hooters? |
| Andy: | Noo. Benihana. Much classier. But don't worry, babes are totally hot too. |
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9
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| Michael Scott: | Who's seen Titanic? |
| Jim Halpert: | I'm not really sure what movie you''re talking about. Are you sure you've got the title right? |
| Pam Beesly: | I think you're thinking of 'The Hunt for Red October.' |
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| Michael Scott: | I just want to know, from the horse's mouth, what is the dealio. Am I too short? |
| Jan: | You know, Michael-- Michael it has nothing to do with your looks, ok? It's your personality. I mean, you're obnoxious, and rude, and stupid, and you do have coffee breath, by the way. And-- and I don't agree about the B.O. but you are very, very inconsiderate. |
| Michael Scott: | Really? |
| Jan: | Really. You're-- you're a great guy okay and-- |
| Michael Scott: | I appreciate that, thank you. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
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| Michael Scott: | The word merger came from the word marriage and that's what today was supposed to be. The loving union between people. Instead, it is become like when my mom moved in with Jeff. And once again it becomes my job to fix it. |
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4
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| Michael Scott: | Do you remember Ed Truck? |
| Creed: | Sure, he hired me. How's he doin'? |
| Michael Scott: | How would I know? |
| Creed: | I thought you might. |
| Michael Scott: | My biggest fear is turning into him. |
| Creed: | Michael, you should have much bigger fears than that. |
| Michael Scott: | I wasn't talking literally, Creed. Yeah, being buried alive would be worse, happy? Why am I talking to you? |
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4
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| Michael Scott: | See that. Mission accomplished. Like a bunch of fourth graders. Sometimes what brings the kids together is hating the lunchlady. Although that'll change, because by the end of the fourth grade the lunchlady was actually the person I hung out with the most. |
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| Phyllis: | Michael, everyone in the engine room drowned. |
| Michael Scott: | Thank you, Spoiler Alert! |
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7
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| Michael Scott: | There could be others. I need to know. I don't want to offend anybody else. |
| Dwight Schrute: | You could assume everyone is, and not say anything offensive. |
| Michael Scott: | Yeah. I'm sure everyone would appreciate me treating them like they were gay. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
19
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| Angela: | You know this is a luncheon shower. Girls only. |
| Michael Scott: | No problem. The guys are having a little shindig of their own in the warehouse. From 2:30 to 3:15. That is the only time that Bob was available. Sort of a guys' night out. A 'G-N-O' if you will. A 'gno.' Actually it's more of a guys' afternoon in. A G-A-I. A gay. Not-- not... it's uh, not gay. It's, uh, just uh, it's a bridal shower for guys. A guy shower. An hour long shower with guys. |
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