Michael Scott Quotes From The Office

Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
2
likes
Holly I found him (Woody) in my bed the next morning.
Michael Scott Oh that's creepy. How did A.J. get in your house?
Holly We live together.
Michael Scott ...oh.
Holly Yeah, it had a little note on it that said "You've got a friend in me."
Michael Scott Yeah... Randy Newman's the best.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
14
likes
Michael Scott: Stripper? Can I ask you a question? About women? Um, should I tell my girlfriend that you danced up on me?
Stripper: Secrets, secrets, are no fun. Secrets, secrets, hurt someone.
Michael Scott: Wow... Thank you.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
11
likes
Call center boss: Everybody in the conference room in five minutes!
Michael Scott: These meetings are useless.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
3
likes
Pam Beesly: You do realize we can't serve liquor at the party.
Michael Scott: Yeah I know, damnit. Stupid corporate wet-blankets. Like booze ever killed anybody.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
29
likes
Michael Scott: Dwight betrayed me once before. So this is his strike two. You know what they say, fool me once, strike one, but fool me twice... strike three.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
7
likes
Michael Scott: Wait, what day is today?
Kevin: Um, tonight is Ghost Whisperer. So Friday.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
5
likes
[hearing Toby in the washroom, through the vent]
Toby: Not much, what's up with you? Nah it's ok, I'm in the bathroom. Hey have you been watching Damages this year? It's so good! No you gotta tune it, it's as good as anything on HBO. [starts urinating...] Hey does blue go with tan?
Michael Scott: Somebody just make the copy?
Toby: Like a- like a blue shirt. I don't wear a lot of color so I have a lot of tan. Uh huh...
Michael Scott: Just make the copy ok?
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
23
likes
Michael Scott: There were these huge bins of clothes, and everybody was rifling through them, like crazy, and I grabbed one. And it fit. So I don't think that this is totally just a women's suit. At the very least it's bisexual.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
22
likes
Andy: What if we changed our outgoing answering machine message so it just has a little more zing and a little more pep.
Michael Scott: Zing and pep. See that's- those are the kind of words we're looking for. Yes Jim.
Jim Halpert: What about if we did an even newer voicemail message that had even more zing and pep.
Michael Scott: Now we're thinking. I like this.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
6
likes
Michael Scott: You didn't actually think that I was gonna spend 60 bucks on pizza.
Oscar: [in the background] It's not pizza!
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
6
likes
Michael Scott: Hello. May I have everyone's attention please. Gabe has instructed me to hand out the leads. So I am going to give the leads to, King Creed.
Phyllis: What are you...
Michael Scott: And to King Meredith!
Stanley: They're not salespeople!
Michael Scott: And to King Angela. Because today we are all kings. And queens. [pats Oscar on the back]
Send "The Office Theme Song" Ringtone to your Cell
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
14
likes
Andy: I'm so sorry man. I really screwed that up. I really--
Michael Scott: Don't worry about it--
Andy: No. I really Schruted it.
Michael Scott: What?
Andy: Schruted it. It's just this thing people say around your office all the time. Like when you screw something up in a really irreversable way, you Schruted it. I don't know where it comes from though. You think it came from Dwight Schrute?
Michael Scott: I don't know. Who knows how words are formed.
Next Page of Michael Scott quotes
Quotes from  Michael Scott  Dwight Schrute  Creed Bratton  Pam  Random Quotes from All Seasons