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Ryan Howard: Hey. You're looking for me?
Pam Halpert: Oh, yeah, we were. We were just looking to say hi. So hey.
Ryan Howard: No you weren't.
Pam Beesly: No we weren't.
Ryan Howard: You wanted to have sex in my office.
Pam Halpert: No.
Jim Halpert: Definitely not. That's disgusting.
Ryan Howard: No. It's... it's cool. Just try to put everything back were you found it. Text me when you're finished. I'll be out here.
[To Camera] Holly and I are like Romeo and Juliet, and the office is like the dragon that kept them apart.
Pam Beesly: Hey, how you doing?
Daryl: Been thinking about my grandmother a lot.
Pam Beesly: Yeah..
Daryl: She was about to turn 97.
Pam Beesly: At least she lived a very long and I'm sure very happy life.
Pam Beesly: Got you this card. When you're ready, we all signed it. We just want you to know we're thinking about you.
Daryl: Thank you.
[Now reading card] 'Congratulations Daryl, let's get wasted. Have fun today big guy. Oh yeah, party time. Whoop. Whoop.'
Pam Beesly: It's possible that some people thought it was your birthday.
[Continues reading] ' Hooray, live it up Big D. Days like this don't come up for a long time, to celebrate. You deserve this.'
[Blows on a noisemaker and wearing a birthday hat]
Andy: Birthday punches!
[starts punching Daryl in the gut while Daryl's eyes water] 1! 2! 3! 4! 5! 6! 7! 8! 9! 10! 11! 12! 13! 14! 15! 16! 17! 18! 19! 20! 21! 22! 23! 24! 25!
[To Kevin who is imitating a monkey] Throw your poop!
Dwight Schrute: Yes, Kevin! Hurl your feces!
Michael Scott: Holly and I are dating. It's been a week, and I still can't believe it.
[sighs] It goes to show that everything you want in life, you get. And you can't work for it. It just comes to you.
Dwight Schrute My perfect Valentine's Day? I'm at home, three cell phones in front of me, fielding desperate calls from people who want to buy one of the fifty restaurant reservations I made over 6 months ago.
[Reading Jim's note] Will you be my valentine? No.
Jim Halpert: Aw nuts.
[After exiting a storage closet with Pam] We took a walk...
Pam Beesly: We took a walk.
Gabe: Look at Jim and Pam. They don't touch. They don't kiss. You would hardly even know that they were husband and wife.
[High-fives Pam] Did it. Love it. Keep it goin'.
Pam Beesly: Let me make something clear. Jim and I have never and will never have sex in the office.
Jim Halpert: No, because the office isn't what I'd consider a romantic place.
Pam Beesly: Besides, we have something those other people don't have, which is a home and a bed.
Jim Halpert: And a shower.
Oscar: Go on. Kiss each other already.
Kevin: Suck it Oscar. This must kill you.
Michael Scott: Holly and I are moving in together. Oscar this must be tough for you, watching this go down. You could not stand in the way of true love my friend.
Oscar: Are you kidding? I wasn't trying to break you guys up.
Kevin: Better luck next time pal!
Michael Scott: Yeah, whatever. No big deal. The hottest girl in the world loves me.
Michael Scott: I don't sit on your lap because it's comfortable. I sit on your lap because I like the way your thighs feel on my butt.
Michael Scott: No more PDA. You win. But here's what we are gonna do. We are going to designate one of our closets as a hook up zone. Anything goes.
Kevin: Can I finish? Is that okay? I was saying... I enjoy watching them because it makes me horny.
[Drunk and yelling] Yeah lunch was great.
Jim Halpert: Shhhhh.
[At a still loud but quieter volume] Lunch was great. They had a fondue and what else did they have?
Jim Halpert: They had a bottomless champagne.
Pam Beesly: We never found that bottom.
Jim Halpert: No we did not.
Erin: "Roses are red. Violets are blue. Look in the vase to find your first clue." Oh, my gosh. It's a romantic scavenger hunt!
Gabe: Oh, close. It's a romantic treasure hunt. A scavenger hunt is where you find items from a master list. This is where you follow clues that lead to a prize. Common misuse. Good luck.
Erin: But there's no clue.
Gabe: Well, get to work.
Erin: I can't, 'cause there's no clue
Gabe: The puzzle is the clue.
Dwight Schrute: Do more stupid faces!
Kevin: Which one? I have a lot of stupid faces.
[Speaking into tape recorder] Boner Bomb starring Jason Statham. Or go against type with an Eisenberg or Michael Cera.
Dwight Schrute: Movie idea?
Michael Scott: Noooo...
[Speaking into tape recorder] Saving the world has never been this hard.
Holly: I'm not saying it won't be hard, but we can make it work...That's what she said.
Dwight Schrute: And what is the hookup zone policy on masturbation?
Michael Scott: Pro.
Michael Scott: Whispering and tickling have their place in business.
Phyllis: Blue Wasabi is so good but get the Cheeseburger. They say they won't do it, but they will if you make a scene.
Ryan: Anybody can be Prince Charming one day a year, with the dinner and the flower and all that, but you know what impresses me? When a guy can do that NO days a year.