Posted: 2571 Quotes from The Office
The Office Season 2 Quotes - Conflict Resolution
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| Jim Halpert: | Dwight tried to kiss me. |
| Michael Scott: | What? |
| Jim Halpert: | And I didn't tell anyone because I'm not really sure how I feel about it. |
| Dwight Schrute: | That is not true. Redact it. Redact it! |
| Jim Halpert: | Well, I'm not actually making a formal complaint. I just really think we should talk about it. |
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| Jim Halpert: | This came out really well. There you go. [hands Dwight his new ID] |
| Dwight Schrute: | This is humongous, I am not a security threat. And my middle name is Kurt, not Fart. |
| Jim Halpert: | What did I write? |
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| Dwight Schrute: | ID badges are long overdue. Security in this office park is a joke. Last year, I came to work with my spud gun in a duffel bag. I sat at my desk all day with a rifle that shoots potatoes at sixty pounds per square inch. Can you imagine if I was deranged? |
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| Michael Scott: | Someone complained that the men's room is whites only. Stanley, you know that's not true. |
| Stanley: | I didn't say that. |
| Creed: | Then why is there a picture of a white man on the door? |
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| Michael Scott: | Ok, Ryan, you told Toby that Creed has a distinct old man smell. |
| [cut to interview] | |
| Creed: | I know exactly what he's talking about. I sprout mung beans on a damp paper towel in my desk drawer. Very nutritious, but they smell like death. |
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| Michael Scott: | Cage matches? Yeah, they work. How could they not work? If they didn't work, everybody would still be in the cage. |
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