Ryan Quotes From The Office

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Ryan: If I had to, I could clean out my desk in five seconds, and nobody would ever know I had ever been here. And I'd forget, too.
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Ryan: It's not part of your job. It's like, maybe you can cook but that doesn't mean you should start a restaurant.
Michael Scott: Well actually I can't cook and I am starting a restaurant. Mike's Cereal Shack. I'm thinking we'll have as many varieties as you can buy in a store.
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Ryan: If you bring your boss to class it automatically bumps you up a full letter grade. So, I'd be stupid not to do it... right?
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[deleted scene from Poor Richards]
Stanley's daughter: [Stanely's daughter enters as Ryan is leaving] Hi Ryan.
Ryan: Hey.
Stanley's daughter: How are you doing? I've...I've missed you.
Ryan: I've missed you too.
Stanley's daughter: Don't you remember me?
Ryan: Umm, you... you gotta give me a hand... Umm, did i meet you at the gym?
Stanley's daughter: No.
Kelly: [In background] Who the hell is Ryan talking to?
Ryan: Are you a client of Dunder Mifflin?
Stanley: [slowly turns around] Oh not again,[stands up] Melissa!
Stanley's daughter: Daddy.
Stanley: [yelling] Wait for me outside.
Ryan: Oh god. [Ryan backs away]
Stanley: [Follows Ryan] She is 16 years old! What is wrong with you?
Ryan: Let me explain what...
Stanley: No, no, no
Ryan: She came right up to me, just like she did when you brought her to work...
Stanley: No, no, no, no
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[Creed is dressed as a vampire for halloween]
Creed: I vant to sell you blood!
Ryan: That's really not the trend in vampires right now.
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Dwight Schrute: I need to change my emergency contact information from Michael Scott.
Ryan: Okay, to what?
Dwight Schrute: Just put... the hospital. Contact number... just put 911. [Dwight leaves]
Michael Scott: He is such a sore loser. You heard, obviously, that I mopped the floor with him this afternoon. ...You know what? Um, do yourself a favor. Just leave me as his contact and I will call the hospital. Cut out the middle man.
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Michael Scott: I need my entourage. Jim! Dwight! Ryan! Common we're going to Asian Hooters.
Ryan: Oh man I can't.
Michael Scott: Why not?
Ryan: I'm not feeling so well. I've got a ton of work to do here. MSG allergy. Peanut allergy. I just ate there last night.
Michael Scott: Ok. Feel better. Common Jim, let's go.
Jim Halpert: Wow. Thanks for taking all the excuses, dude.
Ryan: Doctor appointment, car trouble, plantar warts, granddad fought in World War II. Use your head, man. I keep mine in here. Look alive, Halpert. Welcome back.
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Kelly: If I had created a website with this many problems I'd kill myself.
Ryan: Do you have a question Kelly?
Kelly: Yeah, I have a lot of questions but number one, how dare you.
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Michael Scott: Hey, alright! You know what clearly I'm outnumbered here but could I just say one thing? Please? What is so wrong about me. I'm caring. I'm generous. [pause] I'm sensual. Is it really so horrible that I could possibly go out and find happiness.
Phyllis: Good luck Michael. I hope you find what you're looking for.
Oscar: Maybe you're right. Who are we to--
Pam Beesly: Shut up Oscar! What is wrong with all of you!? He is sleeping with my mother!
Dwight Schrute: I don't think there's a whole lot of sleeping going on.
Michael Scott: Let's get back to the matter at hand.
Pam Beesly: Whatever. You know. Sleep with my mom, sleep with everyone's mom!
Ryan: Whoa!! That's my mom you're talking about.
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Ryan Howard: Do you guys wanna hear about Thailand?
Michael Scott: Oh yeah.
Pam Beesly: Sure.
[long pause]
Ryan Howard: It was indescribable.
Michael Scott: Sounds awesome.
Pam Beesly: Neat.
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Ryan Howard: You know it's a myth women have to gain more than nine pounds in a pregnancy. Look at these actresses, some of them lose weight.
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Quotes from  Michael Scott  Dwight Schrute  Creed Bratton  Pam  Random Quotes from All Seasons