Ryan Quotes From The Office

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Ryan: How do I know that Robert is gay? He liked my Facebook photos at 3 o'clock in the morning.
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Dwight Schrute: I didn't know that you were at a party on Saturday night.
Ryan: I go to... a lot of parties.
Dwight Schrute: Ok, I'm going to need to search your car. Give me your keys.
Ryan: I am not giving you my keys.
Dwight Schrute: Don't make me do this the hard way.
Ryan: What's the hard way?
Dwight Schrute: I go down to the police station on my lunch break. I tell a police officer - I know several - what I suspect you may have in your car. He requests a hearing from a judge and obtains a search warrant. Once he has said warrant, he will drive over here and make you give him the keys to your car, and you will have to obey him.
Ryan: Yeah, let's do it that way.
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Michael Scott: For my emergency contact put Todd F. Packer. Do you know what the 'F' stands for?
Ryan: Fudge?
Michael Scott: How did you--
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Dwight Schrute: Listen, temp, I am conducting a little investigation, so I am no longer going to be able to head up spring cleaning. Do you think you can handle it?
Ryan: Yeah, I think I can handle it.
Dwight Schrute: Do you think, or do you know?
Ryan: I think.
Dwight Schrute: Oh God, here.
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Ryan [holding a slice of pizza] Ok not to point out the glaringly obvious, but doesn't the fact that I'm in this group make anyone feel just a little bit better. [takes a bite] Oh! This crust is sharp! Ah.
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David Wallace: Here's the situation. Your company is four weeks old. I know this business I know what suppliers are charging. I know you can't be making very much money. I don't know how your prices are so low, but I know it can't keep up that way. I'm sure you're scared. Probably in debt. That's the best offer you're going to get.
Michael Scott: I'll see your situation and I'll raise you a situation. Your company is losing clients left and right. You have a stockholder meeting coming up and you are going to have to explain to them why your most profitable branch is bleeding. So they may be looking for a little change in the CFO. So I don't think I need to wait out Dunder Mifflin. I think I just have to wait out you.
David Wallace: Ok now I don't know that I can get this, I do have to go to the board for approval. How's about, sixty-thousand dollars. [pause] Hmm? Sixty thousand. Michael?
[gibberish]
Ryan: We're gonna have to talk about this.
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Pam Beesly: Are those Michael's Levi's?
Ryan: Yeah. Who drycleans jeans?
Pam Beesly: Michael and his jeans... he gets in them, and I'm not exactly sure what happens, but I can tell you he loves the way he looks in those jeans. I know that's why he started casual Fridays.
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Michael Scott: 1-2-3 what are we gonna do!
Pam Beesly: Corner idea...
Michael Scott: No-- you're supposed to say, "rock the house!"
Ryan: Rock the house!
Pam Beesly: How would we know that?
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Dwight Schrute: Final question, young Ryan Howard. What is Michael Scott's greatest fear?
Ryan: Um, lonliness. Maybe women.
Dwight Schrute: Wrong... he's not afraid of anything. Also, I would have accepted snakes.
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