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The Office Quotes (NBC) | Random Quotes from The Office

Random Quotes from The Office

Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
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Jim Halpert: Uh oh, this former Administrative Assistant misspelled "Administrative" and "Assistant".
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
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Michael Scott: No, that is the fun of this place. I call everybody faggy. Why would anyone find that offensive?
Toby: Okay, I think Oscar would just like it if you used lame' or something like that.
Michael Scott: That's what faggy means.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
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Dwight Schrute: Well I''m not paying for my own stuff, okay? I know you did this because you're friends with the vending machine guy.
Jim Halpert: Who, Steve?
Dwight Schrute: Yeah Steve, whatever his name is.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
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Michael Scott: No matter how I look at this I am in the wrong. And I have looked at this thing like a hundred different ways. From my point of view, from their point of view... 98 others. And bottom line, I am in the wrong. I'm the bad guy.
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Michael Scott: Erin. Coffee.
Erin: Ok.
Michael Scott: Not from the kitchen. Stop & Shop. If it's not Stop & Shop I send it back. Large. If it's a medium I send it back. If it's an extra-large I send it back.
Erin: How do you return coffee?
Michael Scott: Go.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
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Michael Scott: There's always a distance between a boss and the employees, its just nature's rule. It's intimidation mostly. It's the awareness that they are not me.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
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Toby [to camera] I know people are only excited to talk to me because of the trial. But if they talk to me for a while, and maybe people realize that I have something to say. And then one day... we're just talking.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
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Toby: I'm not processing this.
Michael Scott: Look, Jim... needed a relaxing lunch. He has been depressed, and it has been affecting his productivity. How is that not work related?
Toby: He seems fine to me.
Michael Scott: You're not his friend, you don't know. He is in love with a girl he works with who's engaged, so cut me some slack, please.
Kelly: Pam?!
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
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Interviewee: First, I'll take down the cubicle walls. Singular transparency. There'd be no titles. Everyone has the same job. Same goes for me. I'll take your job by rejecting the title. Everyone will be known for their accomplishments.
Jim Halpert: That's very interesting. Um, I feel like there might be a conflict there. And if a conflict did arise, how would that be dealt with?
Interviewee: Oh... Yeah... Scratch everything from before. I'll tell you what. Go the other way. More cubicles. More division. Everyone is somebody's boss. And that person can fire the person below them. And once a month, the lowest person. [Imitates cutting throat] Buh-bye.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
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Dwight Schrute: [to Michael] When you land, try and land like an eight year old. These bouncy castles are not designed for adults.
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Dwight Schrute: [yelling at Kelly] What did you learn in there? I bet you learned things, huh. Like how to fashion a shiv. Hmm?
Jim Halpert: Hey, what the hell's going on?
Dwight Schrute: Why don't you tell Jim where you were from age fourteen to fifteen.
Kelly: I was kickin' it.
Dwight Schrute: In juvie.
Jim Halpert: What?
Dwight Schrute: Juvie. Nile. Detention center. Where they send teenagers!
Jim Halpert: Yep.
Dwight Schrute: For re--
Jim Halpert: Got it.
Dwight Schrute: [to Kelly] What did you do?
Jim Halpert: Dwight? Sounds like she was fourteen so maybe you wanna go a little easy.
Dwight Schrute: If she's old enough to get married, she's old enough to follow the law. What did you do!
Kelly: My boyfriend dumped me. So I stole his boat. I mean he told me it was his boat it was actually his father's. I just thought it would be really romantic, like Thelma and Louise, but with like a boat. And it was, the worst year of my life and I can't believe that you guys are making me talk about this on my birthday!
Dwight Schrute: I thought you said yesterday was your birthday!
Jim Halpert: Hey! You know what? I... got you a cake!
Kelly: [happy all of a sudden] You did? I wanna see the cake.
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Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
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Dwight Shrute: Can't a guy just buy some bagels for his friends so they'll owe him a favor which he can use to get someone fired who stole a co-manager position from him anymore? Jeez. When did everyone get soo cynical?
Quotes from  Michael Scott  Dwight Schrute  Creed Bratton  Pam  Random Quotes from All Seasons

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