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The Office Quotes (NBC) | Season 5 - Dream Team

The Office Season 5 Quotes - Dream Team

  • Quotes
  • Conference Room (9 Comments)
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23
likes
Michael Scott: [to Pam, upset in car] I thrive on negativity. In the seventh grade, my math teacher told me I was flunking. You know what? The next day I scored six goals for my hockey team. So there you go.
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16
likes
Jim Halpert: Charles is having Kevin cover the phones for a while. How do I say this diplomatically... I think Kevin is doing exactly as well as anyone might have expected someone like him to preform in a position like that.
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14
likes
Michael Scott: Just out of curiosity how much do you get paid here?
Ryan Howard: Sixty thousand dollars a year.
Pam Beesly: You get paid by the year at the bowling alley?
Ryan Howard: What do you make, secretary?
Employee: Get back to work shoe bitch!
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13
likes
Jim Halpert: I've never been a kiss up. I-- it's just not how I operate. I mean I've always subscribed to the idea that if you really want to impress your boss, you go in there and you do mediocre work, half-heatedly.
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12
likes
Vikram: He seems really confident.
Pam Beesly: He can be.
Vikram: Confidence. It's the food of the wiseman but the liquor of the fool.
Pam Beesly: Humph. I'm looking forward to getting to know you better, Vikram.
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12
likes
Ryan Howard: Do you guys wanna hear about Thailand?
Michael Scott: Oh yeah.
Pam Beesly: Sure.
[long pause]
Ryan Howard: It was indescribable.
Michael Scott: Sounds awesome.
Pam Beesly: Neat.
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11
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Kevin: [acting as receptionist and reading from a cue card] Dunder Mifflin. This is Kevin. Please hold while I transfer you. [covers phone] Oscar! Your mom!
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11
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[at Michael's condo]
Michael Scott: Would you like some French toast?
Pam Beesly: Yes please.
Michael Scott: What shape?
Pam Beesly: ...square is fine?
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11
likes
Michael Scott: I have egg in my Crocs!
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11
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Jim Halpert: Yep. I used to play soccer in school. From second to forth grade. I was on the orange team.
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10
likes
Vikram: He's taking a long time. Is it possible he's bowling? I mean you know him better than I do.
Pam Beesly: Yes. Yes it's possible. [gets out of the car]
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9
likes
Phyllis: I never see him drink. I never see him eat.
Stanley: I don't think he even uses the bathroom.
Creed: Oh he does. He does.
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6
likes
Pam Beesly: Today's my first day at my new job at Michael Scott Paper Company Incorporated. You know Apple Computer started in a garage. And we're starting in a condo. So we already have a leg up on Apple.
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6
likes
Stanley: I prefer Maradona. Uhh [reading from hidden notes] Diego Maradona. From Argentina.
Charles Miner: Oh yeah. I didn't know we had so many, uh, soccer fans in the office!
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6
likes
[surprising Ryan at the bowling alley]
Michael Scott: Hey! I would like a pair of size nines please. It's Michael!
Ryan: I'm swamped Michael. [into microphone] Happy birthday to Sally in lane twenty-seven.
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6
likes
[on hiring Ryan]
Michael Scott: Pam, everyone deserves a second, second chance.
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5
likes
Jim Halpert: Ah it's cause I'm more of a player.
Charles Miner: Oh yeah?
Jim Halpert: You bet.
Dwight Schrute: Really, Jim. I had no idea you played soccer. Cause you never /ever/ talk about it.
Jim Halpert: Well I do. I play.
Dwight Schrute: You can be so modest sometimes.
Jim Halpert: Well maybe we should get back to work.
Dwight Schrute: Maybe you and Charles should kick the soccer ball around.
Jim Halpert: Maybe we will someday.
Dwight Schrute: Maybe you will tonight after work, whaddaya say?
Charles Miner: It's a great idea, Dwight!
Dwight Schrute: Oh ideas are just part, of what I bring, to the table. I don't try to be anything that I'm not.
Charles Miner: Whaddaya, Jim? Huh, you wanna play some soccer? Hey hey anybody else?
Dwight Schrute: Game on!
Charles Miner: See you on the field there bro. Ha ha can't waittt!
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5
likes
Michael Scott: Imagine a company that has no memory of your past misconduct because they have no files.
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2
likes
Ryan Howard: Do you guys wanna hear about Thailand?
Pam/Michael: Sure!
Ryan Howard: It was indescribable.
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2
likes
Michael Scott: [opens door in bathrobe] Oh good, my hooker's here.
Pam Beesly: Michael, you were expecting me, right?
Michael Scott: Yes I was, Pam, yes I was.
Pam Beesly: Are you wearing anything under that?
Michael Scott: That is inappropriate, Pam, come on in.
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1
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Michael Scott: I feel weak today. Felt much strong yesterday. Like Benjamin Button in reverse.
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1
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Michael Scott: Oh good, my hooker's here.
Pam Beasley: Michael, you were expecting me, right?
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0
likes
Pam Beasley: We got Vikram!
Vikram: You got me.
9 Comments in the Conference Room
Quotes from  Michael Scott  Dwight Schrute  Creed Bratton  Pam  Random Quotes from All Seasons

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