Warning: session_start(): open(/home/office/public_html/tmp/sess_c748d8e9d776b747c56a9992ff12382c, O_RDWR) failed: Permission denied (13) in /home/office/public_html/index.php on line 9
The Office Quotes (NBC) | Season 2 - The Secret

The Office Season 2 Quotes - The Secret

  • Quotes
  • Conference Room (3 Comments)
  • Download Episode (iTunes Link)
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
30
likes
Kevin: Jim has got it bad for Pam.
Creed: Oooh! ...Which one is Pam?
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
21
likes
Dwight Schrute: Guess what I found out about Oscar tonight? He was lying about being sick! Should I have reported Oscar's malfeasance? Hmm... probably. But now I know something he doesn't want me to know. So I can use his malfeasance to establish leverage. Otherwise, it's just malfeasance for malfeasance's sake.
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
20
likes
Michael Scott: So, uh, what's the 411? Any updates on the, uh, the P situation?
Jim Halpert: I don't know what you mean.
Michael Scott: P-A-M.
Jim Halpert: Yeah, I know.
Michael Scott: P-A...
Jim Halpert: Uh!
Michael Scott: M...
Jim Halpert: Okay.
Michael Scott: No, it's okay, we're talking code.
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
18
likes
Ryan: If I had to, I could clean out my desk in five seconds, and nobody would ever know I had ever been here. And I'd forget, too.
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
17
likes
Dwight Schrute: Listen, temp, I am conducting a little investigation, so I am no longer going to be able to head up spring cleaning. Do you think you can handle it?
Ryan: Yeah, I think I can handle it.
Dwight Schrute: Do you think, or do you know?
Ryan: I think.
Dwight Schrute: Oh God, here.
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
16
likes
Michael Scott: Jim and I are great friends. We hang out a ton, mostly at work...
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
16
likes
Toby: You just got your corporate credit card back. Do you really want me to take it away again?
Michael Scott: I put a cigarette through a freakin' quarter! And you know what, Toby? They almost bought from us!
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
14
likes
Michael Scott: [to Stanley] Peach Iced Tea. You're gonna hate it.
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
14
likes
Toby: I'm not processing this.
Michael Scott: Look, Jim... needed a relaxing lunch. He has been depressed, and it has been affecting his productivity. How is that not work related?
Toby: He seems fine to me.
Michael Scott: You're not his friend, you don't know. He is in love with a girl he works with who's engaged, so cut me some slack, please.
Kelly: Pam?!
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
10
likes
Michael Scott: [at Hooters] Oh man you should order milk. Get it?
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
10
likes
Ryan: Creed, did you organize the menu book?
Creed: Oh, I thought that was more on a volunteer basis.
Ryan: No, that was mandatory.
Creed: Oh I thought it was a volunteer thing.
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
9
likes
Angela: Oscar is off sick.
Dwight Schrute: That's unacceptable.
Angela: I agree, that is unnacceptable.
[they stare at each other]
Kevin: ...What are you guys doing?
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
9
likes
Dwight Schrute: Merideth, you're in charge of the men's bathroom. Make sure you replace the urinal cakes, they're all worn down.
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
8
likes
Michael Scott: It's graaaaaaape soda!
Jim Halpert: Tony The Tiger... you don't hear that much anymore.
Michael Scott: Yeah. Not so much.
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
8
likes
Michael Scott: Tell me Dana, how is your chicken breast?
Waitress: Oh, it's great. It's served with our world famous wing sauce.
Michael Scott: Mmmm, sounds yummy. I will have a chicken breast, hold the chicken.
Waitress: Is that what you really want?
Michael Scott: No, I'm gonna have the gourmet hotdog.
Waitress: Great.
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
7
likes
Michael Scott: What's my favorite thing about Hooters? I'll give you two: boobs and hot wings!
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
6
likes
Jim Halpert: Well, the cat's out of the bag. I used to have a crush on Pam, and now I don't. Riveting.
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
4
likes
Michael Scott: What flavor of coffee is that? Up-dog?
Ryan Howard: What's that?
Michael Scott: I don't know. What's up with you?
Ryan Howard: Huh?
Michael Scott: No, damn it.
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
4
likes
Jim Halpert: Hey, Mike.
Michael Scott: Hey, Jim Bag.
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
3
likes
Michael Scott: Dwight! Hey, is it me, or does it this place smell like up-dog?
Dwight Schrute: What's up-dog?
Michael Scott: Gotcha! Oh, God. Crap. Nothing. How ya doing?
Dwight Schrute: Good! How are you doing?
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
3
likes
Dwight Schrute: There are several different ways to tell if a perp is lying. The liar will avoid direct eye contact. The liar will cover part of his or her face with his hands, especially the mouth. The liar will perspire. Unfortunately I spoke to Oscar on the phone so none of this is useful.
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
2
likes
Jim Halpert: Nothing much, what's up with you?
Pam Beesly: I cannot believe I fell for that. [laughs]
Michael Scott: [walks in] What? Where's the funny? Give it to me.
Jim Halpert: Um, is it just me, or does it smell like up-dog in here?
Michael Scott: What's up-dog?
Jim Halpert: Nothing much, what's up with you?
Michael Scott: Oh, oh, wow! I walked right into that. Oh, that's brilliant!
Clock-in to vote or Register with Human Resources if you're not signed up!    
2
likes
Michael Scott: Hey Stanley, is that jacket made of up-dog?
Stanley Hudson: I'm on the phone.
3 Comments in the Conference Room
Quotes from  Michael Scott  Dwight Schrute  Creed Bratton  Pam  Random Quotes from All Seasons

Warning: Unknown: open(/home/office/public_html/tmp/sess_c748d8e9d776b747c56a9992ff12382c, O_RDWR) failed: Permission denied (13) in Unknown on line 0

Warning: Unknown: Failed to write session data (files). Please verify that the current setting of session.save_path is correct (/home/office/public_html/tmp) in Unknown on line 0