Ryan Quotes From The Office

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Michael Scott: [on the phone] This is Michael Jackson calling from Wonderland.
Ryan: You mean Neverland?
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Ryan: I ground up four extra-strength Aspirin and put them in Michael's pudding. I do the same with my dog to get him to take his heartworm medicine.
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Ryan: [holds up a name card with 'Kelly' on it]
Stanley: That was meant for Kelly.
Ryan: Yeah. I figured.
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Ryan: Ok. So, um. Listen. I know about your diabolical plan.
Dwight Schrute: What?! "Diabolical plan?" I wouldn't even know how to begin a--
[Ryan holds up a report: My Diabolical Plan by Dwight K. Schrute]
Ryan: I found a copy of it in the copier tray.
Dwight Schrute: So what do you want.
Ryan: I want the same thing you want. I want to take Jim Halpert Down. I want in.
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Jim Halpert: I just figured you needed a place where you could concentrate. And not be bothered by... bothering people.
Ryan: Ok.
Jim Halpert: Let me show you what I mean. [opens supply closet] Your new office. How great is that, right? For a job well done, well, not done.
Ryan: I will, uh, I will do my work, right now. I will stay late tonight.
Jim Halpert: Right.
Ryan: Um, I-- very sorry. About everything.
Jim Halpert: [laughs and slaps Ryan on the shoulder] You're a good kid. You know what it gets bigger once you're in there. [slams door and walks away] Enjoy it.
Ryan: Is there internet?
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Ryan: You have to know how to work this. There is no excuse for this.
Michael Scott: Yep.
Ryan: I can get you a tutor if you need--
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Ryan: If you bring your boss to class it automatically bumps you up a full letter grade. So, I'd be stupid not to do it... right?
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Ryan: What about this bottle of power drink?
Michael Scott: What flavor?
Ryan: Blue.
Michael Scott: Blue is not a flavor.
Ryan: It says, flavor: blue blast.
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Ryan: Hey guys! What's happening? How's my favorite branch doing!
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