Ryan Quotes From The Office
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| Ryan: | When I was five, my mom told me that the fish went to the hospital, in the toilet, and it never came back. So we had a funeral for it. And I remember thinking, 'I'm a little too old for this.' And I was five. |
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| Jim Halpert: | Well, take it slow, because it seems like a lot of the time things like that need to-- |
| [Ryan enters] | |
| Ryan: | Soda. |
| Kelly: | Cool. Hey so, do you want to do something tonight? |
| Jim Halpert: | Wow. [under his breath] Oh, no, not while I'm here. |
| Kelly: | I mean, I know its Valentine's Day and all, but there's totally no pressure at all. |
| Ryan: | I can't tonight. I have plans with my friends. |
| Kelly: | That's cool. I completely understand. |
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| Pam Beesly: | Hey Ryan! |
| Ryan: | [walks in typing to Blackberry] Hello, one second. [returns to blackberry] Hey Pam it's great to see you is Michael in? |
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| Ryan: | The problem with having "it" or the "x" factor or whatever it is you want to call it, is that it's impossible to put into words what you're bringing to the table. So to make things simpler for DeAngelo, I just, without lying, strongly implied that I'm Kelly's supervisor. It's not even that much of a stretch. She pretty much does whatever I say. |
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| Ryan Howard: | Do you guys wanna hear about Thailand? |
| Michael Scott: | Oh yeah. |
| Pam Beesly: | Sure. |
| [long pause] | |
| Ryan Howard: | It was indescribable. |
| Michael Scott: | Sounds awesome. |
| Pam Beesly: | Neat. |
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| Andy: | I'M SO JEALOUS RIGHT NOW!! |
| Michael Scott: | Hey, you know who you shouldn't be jealous of. Yourself. Because YOUR invited, and YOUR invited, and YOUR invited, and you, and you and you and you, and you-- |
| Limo driver: | Car seats eight. |
| Michael Scott: | What? |
| Limo driver: | The car seats eight. |
| Michael Scott: | The limo seats eight. |
| Michael Scott: | Ok. Then Jim and Pam. And Ryan plus a guest. |
| Jim and Pam together: | No thanks. |
| Ryan: | I'll use it when you're done. |
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| Meredith: | Stop fighting! Just on St. Patrick's Day ok? Just one, perfect day a year. No hassles. No problems. No kids. |
| Ryan: | Why no kids? |
| Kelly: | Yeah where are your kids? |
| Meredith: | Nope. Uh uh. [starts walking away] Not today! |
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| Ryan: | Everybody wants to be rich, but nobody wants to work for it. |
| Pam Beesly: | You came in at 10:30 today, right? |
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| Dwight Schrute: | The new IT guy. Nick. |
| Ryan: | Nick. |
| Dwight Schrute: | I think he is the key. He is very trusting, he's looking for friends. He's been given an awesome amount of power and does not know how to wield it. |
| Ryan: | Like Frodo. |
| Dwight Schrute: | Why don't you just let me handle the Tolkien references. OK, Dumb Jock? |
| Ryan: | Well I think he can be corrupted. Like Gollum. |
| Dwight Schrute: | Smeagle, was corrupted and became Gollum. |
| [cut to talking head] | |
| Dwight Schrute: | I might start a diabolical plot against him after this one. |
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| Ryan Howard | [using phone] For all their genorosity of spirit, they password protect their wireless? |
| Kelly | Try "Jesus". |