Dwight Schrute Quotes From The Office

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Dwight Schrute: Back injuries are common. Not as common as knee injuries but more common than wrist injuries.
Michael Scott: I don't need a history lesson ok?
Dwight Schrute: What do you think history is?
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Dwight Schrute: I'm sorry am I interrupting? Oh God were you guys making out?
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Andy: Why did we pretend like we worked here?
Dwight Schrute: Is that what we were doing?
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Jim's Roommate: Nice Birkenstocks.
Dwight Schrute: Thanks. I have another pair in my car for special occasions.
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Dwight Schrute: My father's name was Dwight Schrute. My grandfather's name was Dwight Schrute. His father's name Dwide Schrude. Amish. I loved my father very much. Every morning he'd wake up at dawn and make us biscuits with gravy. When I was little my dad and I played a lot of games together. My dad cheated a lot but I never busted him on it. I would have, except I didn't know about it. He didn't tell me till years later. I was shocked when I found out.
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Michael Scott: Dwight is a wuss. When we rented Armageddon, he cried at the end of it.
Dwight Schrute: That was because it was New Year's Eve and it started to snow at exactly midnight.
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Jim Halpert: We, have, a lot to do, and, you are... putting up a very effeminate sign. Is that what you've been doing? Making a sign?
Dwight Schrute: It's not effeminate. It's festive.
Jim Halpert: You been making that sign, for something we could just announce to the whole office. [still staring at Dwight] Hey everybody, the party's now at three!
Stanley: I know I just read it on the sign.
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Michael Scott: I just-- I met a woman when I was giving blood and I thought she might come by.
Kelly: You met a woman when you were giving blood that's so romantic!
Michael Scott: It's not a big deal, really. I just, you know, met somebody, talked, I picked up her glove so I was hoping I could give it back to her.
Kelly: Oh my God that makes it even more romantic! This is like a modern day Enchanted. It's like a fairy tale!
Meredith: She could be your soul mate.
Dwight Schrute: No not likely. There are three billion women on the planet, most of them live in Asia so the numbers just don't add up.
Kelly: She could be!
Michael Scott: Believe me, it's nothing. I hardly even talked to her. We just-- we were lying there next to each other. I think our blood bags touched.
Kelly: Ohhhhhhhh!
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Dwight Schrute: Does it bother me that I wasn't invited to Michael's dinner party? [starts crying]
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Dwight Schrute: Are you enjoying your vegetarian noodles?
Angela: Very much. How's your meat?
Dwight Schrute: Dry. Delicious.
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Dwight Schrute: [inspecting Andy's car] Scratch!
Andy: Ahh that's a racing stripe.
Send "The Office Theme Song" Ringtone to your Cell
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Dwight Schrute: What are you gonna do now? You gonna make fun of our leader's weird voice? [mumbles] Over the line, Jim.
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