Oscar Quotes From The Office

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Michael Scott: [on his cellphone] No, I'll talk to her. No, nobody talks to my baby that way. Yeah I'll let you know how it goes. Alright. Bye, Pickle. [hangs up and walks into the conference room] Pamela Morgan Beesly you need to apologize to your mother right now.
Angela: I'm sorry, I was told I have the floor.
Oscar: Whoa hold on, hold on. What's going on?
Jim Halpert: Nothing! Nothing at all. "It's all goood."
Pam Beesly: I'm not apologizing to anyone. Michael owes ME an apology.
Michael Scott: For trying to find happiness in the arms of a lover?
Pam Beesly: Don't call my mother your lover!
Kevin: Yes! That's what I'm talking about.
Andy: That is not ok dude!
Michael Scott: Ok, in my defence--
Phyllis: Disgusting.
Creed: That's messed up man.
Pam Beesly: Yes. Thank you. Welcome to my personal hell!
Oscar: You have no sense of boundaries, Michael.
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Oscar: Part of me wants people in the office to have learned their lesson and just shut the hell up. But part of me thinks, you know what? Keep talking. I'd really love a home theater.
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Michael Scott: Maybe we could go out for a beer sometime, and you could tell me... how you do that to another dude.
Oscar: That sounds like a great, wonderful idea. Let's do that.
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Andy: [during the meeting] I'll drop an ethics bomb on you. Would you steal bread to feed your family. [oscar waits] Boom!
Oscar: Exactly, Andy.
Andy: Yeah. I took Intro to Philosophy, twice! No big deal.
Dwight Schrute: It's a trick question. The bread is poisoned. Also, it's not your real family. You've been cuckolded by a stronger, smarter male.
Andy: No that's... not how it works.
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Oscar: [in front of a image from a projector] See that? The obvious symmetry of the face. This is a natural appeal of the scientific standard of coinalphelia, features that are a composite average of many features. Yes she's attractive. But, she's not hot.
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[Creed walks into the office dressed as the Joker]
Oscar: Whoa! Awesome!
Creed: Let's put a smile on that FACE! [walks away]
[Kevin stands up from behind his desk, also dressed as the Joker]
Kevin: Damn it, Creed! I've been up since four!
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Michael Scott: Alright, since I am the boss I will drive as well. Who wants shotgun?
Oscar: You can't be serious. You ran a woman over this morning.
Michael Scott: Everybody inside the car was fine, Stanley.
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Michael Scott: Hey, alright! You know what clearly I'm outnumbered here but could I just say one thing? Please? What is so wrong about me. I'm caring. I'm generous. [pause] I'm sensual. Is it really so horrible that I could possibly go out and find happiness.
Phyllis: Good luck Michael. I hope you find what you're looking for.
Oscar: Maybe you're right. Who are we to--
Pam Beesly: Shut up Oscar! What is wrong with all of you!? He is sleeping with my mother!
Dwight Schrute: I don't think there's a whole lot of sleeping going on.
Michael Scott: Let's get back to the matter at hand.
Pam Beesly: Whatever. You know. Sleep with my mom, sleep with everyone's mom!
Ryan: Whoa!! That's my mom you're talking about.
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Oscar: Look it doesn't take a genius to know that every organization thrives when it has two leaders. [shakes head] Go ahead, name a country that doesn't have two presidents. A boat that sets sail without two captains. Where would Catholicism be, without the popes.
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Quotes from  Michael Scott  Dwight Schrute  Creed Bratton  Pam  Random Quotes from All Seasons