Pam Quotes From The Office

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Pam Beesly: [about Michael's birthday lunch for Pam's mom] Why did I get in the car? I could have struggled. I have a whistle in my purse, I didn't even blow it.
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Michael Scott: I think that fate put this catalog in my hand.
Pam Beesley: Actually I put the catalog in your hand because you have to pick out a new chair.
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Michael Scott: Spamster.
Pam Beesly: Um... Pam, plus spam, plus?
Michael Scott: Hamster.
Pam Beesly: Right.
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Pam Beesly: Here's what we think happened: Michael's sidekick, who all through the movie is this complete idiot who's causing the downfall of the United States, was originally named Dwight. But then Michael changed it to Samuel L. Chang using a search and replace, but that doesn't work on misspelled words, leaving behind one Dwigt. And Dwight figured it out. Oops.
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Dwight Schrute: Through simple concentration I can both raise and lower my cholesterol.
Pam Beesly: Why would you raise your cholesterol?
Dwight Schrute: So I can lower it.
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Pam Beesly: I make that one copy and I become the girl who makes copies. And by the end of the day I'm the receptionist again. And the worst part is, I like making copies. The paper comes out all warm and stuff. And it's cold in there! Because it's technically a closet.
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Pam Beesly: Here's what I was thinking: Everyone sits on a chair everyday, but not everyone--
Michael Scott: Sits on a copier.
Pam Beesly: Or, even USES the copier every day.
Michael Scott: Yeah. Very valid!
Pam Beesly: That's it. [laughing] Alright. See ya later... hot tie guy!
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Dwight Schrute: Pam, I am not an unreasonable man. If you guys stay, I will stop watering down the soap.
Pam Beesly: You've been watering down the soap?
Dwight Schrute: Why do you even need soap? Are you that bad at going to the bathroom?
Pam Beesly: We need everything back the way it was.
Dwight Schrute: You don't wanna move. Moving is one of the most stressful things you can do in life. You'll probably just take it out on your kid. Jim will turn to the drink. The family will fall apart, and twenty five years from now, Cece will become world famous... for stripping.
Pam Beesly: That's a sad story. I have another one. We move, the other tenants follow, the bank takes the building, takes your farm, takes your car and beats the crap out of you. Penniless, you die, and my daughter Cece dances on your grave... fully clothed. [lights turn off, Pam and Dwight begin to wave their arms to alert the sensor]
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Dwight Schrute: [giving the volleyball to Pam to serve] Okay! Hey Pam how're you doing! Hey do you know if you're right-handed or left-handed. Or do you even know? What hand do you use to answer the phone.
Pam Beesly: Back off Dwight.
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Pam Beesly: There is no rush to get to the hospital. I'm fine. I'll get there. And if I don't get there, I don't get there.
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[standing outside of Michael's car decorated with "GOING TO A WEDDING"]
Michael Scott: Well, what do you think? Spent all morning doing it.
Jim Halpert: It is really special.
Pam Beesly: Yeah, but, aren't you supposed to do that to our-- [Jim shakes his head] No, it's great!
Michael Scott: It's just a really important day for me.
Jim Halpert: Well congrats. [shakes Michael's hand]
Michael Scott: Thanks.
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Quotes from  Michael Scott  Dwight Schrute  Creed Bratton  Pam  Random Quotes from All Seasons